Chapter Forty Six

Nigel opened the door and Khushi got out of the car. She quickly rushed into UPS and had her package sent out. Khushi had just gotten out the store when her phone rang. Khushi couldn't help but to smirk when she saw Arnav's calling.

"Good afternoon Mr. Raizada," Khushi beamed.

"Playing innocent won't help you angel," he replied.

Khushi looked out to the street to check if there was a car coming and crossed the street. "Playing innocent? Whatever do you mean?"

"Angel," he warned.

Khushi got in the car and it pulled into traffic. "Don't angel me. I've done nothing wrong and you know it. Now I may have, let's say, put you in a situation," Khushi smirked, "but that's about it. And with the last text I sent you, well, I'm proud of myself. So proud, I'm hugging myself again," she said, doing just that. "Now you tell me Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada, what are you going to do about it?"

The car came to a halt and Khushi looked up. She had no idea where they were, though it looked like a run-down area by the water.

"Uh Nigel... where are we," Khushi asked, fear beginning to surface.

Instead of responding, he got out of the car and went around to open the door for Khushi. Khushi just blinked, fear taking over her. Her phone beeped and she looked at it to see that her call had ended because she had no bars. 

With a gulp, Khushi stepped out of the car. Just as she turned to look at Nigel, he grabbed her by her wrist and pulled her along with him.

"What the-? Nigel, where are you taking me," Khushi exclaimed.

She got no response and continued to be pulled along.

Oh my god, Khushi thought. Why has Nigel gone rogue? Where the hell is he taking me? Who is he taking me to? Why kidnap me? I've done nothing wrong- oh my god, am I being held hostage? Are there people after Arnav? Please god, no, please let Arnav be safe!

Khushi got pulled over to the side and was pushed up against a cargo holder.

"Nigel, what the hell are you-?"

Khushi's eyes widened. It wasn't Nigel who had dragged her out here - it was Arnav.

"What the fuck Arnav!" She punched him in the stomach, but it had no affect on him. "What the actual fuck is wrong with you?"

Arnav didn't say anything and just looked at her.

"You fucking scared me to death," she exclaimed, tears threatening to fall. "I thought someone was after you! I thought you were being threatened for money, so they kidnapped me for hostage! For fuck's sake do you have any idea what kind of thoughts ran through my head! If anything happened to you.... Who the hell does something like this?! And why are you smiling?!"

Arnav didn't say anything and continued to smile softly.

"This isn't funny Arnav! Why did you do this? Is this payback for the picture I sent you? Well this is far worse than what I did! In fact, it's beyond! You-"

Arnav cut her off with a kiss, leaving Khushi looking at him with wide eyes. When he pulled away, he leaned his forehead against hers, caressing her cheek in his hand.

"I love you," Arnav breathed.

Khushi was confused, but she replied anyway. "I love you too Arnav, but what you did was ridiculous," she said softly, wrapping her arms around his neck to hug him. "Why did you do it?"

Arnav sighed and buried his face in the crook of her neck. "I had a thought earlier and I... I just ended up doing this."

"Why?"

"I wanted to see you, so I called Nigel up while you were at UPS and I quickly drove over and switched places with him."

"You're lucky he wears a chauffeur's hat," Khushi muttered.

Arnav chuckled and his breath tickled Khushi along her neck.

"What were you thinking earlier," Khushi asked.

Arnav pulled back. "That thought is for another day, another time."

Khushi frowned. "Arnav, you can't just tell me you had a thought, kidnap me, and then leave me hanging."

"No, but it's a start. I want you to get to know me."

Khushi caressed his face. "Well if you ask me, I'd say I'm the only person who truly knows you."

"True, but not everything about me."

Khushi scrunched her eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

Arnav held her hand. "Follow me."

Khushi nodded and she followed beside Arnav. They walked around a bit, but Khushi had no idea where they were, nor why they were here.

What does this place have to do with him, Khushi wondered.

Arnav came to a halt and so did Khushi.

"Arnav, what are we doing here," Khushi asked softly.

Arnav glanced around at the place, nothing but empty shipping cargo holders around. "A part of my past is here. Of who I used to be."

Arnav turned to look at her. "I used to bring my submissives here."

Khushi's eyes widened and she quickly tried to hide it. "Here," she said, though she ended up stuttering.

"Yes, here."

Arnav released her hand and walked around. "I used to bring some of my submissives here - those who could handle it and-slash-or wanted it."

"What would you do to them?"

Arnav went over to one of the cargo holders and opened it up. Khushi went behind him and looked inside the massive, empty holder.

"I'd keep them in here," Arnav simply said.

Khushi looked at him with wide eyes.

"They'd stay here, night after night, with food and water if provided, naked."

"Naked?"

Arnav nodded. "It's what they loved. To be treated like a well, taken-cared pet."

Khushi nodded in acknowledgement and looked at the holder. She gulped and stepped in. She went to the middle and looked around, wondering what it would have been like to stay here night after night.

"To tell you the truth, I never understood why people like stuff like this," she said, waving her hand to gesture her surroundings. "I've seen a lot of stuff on Tumblr where Dominant's have kept their submissives in cages, or in this case, cargo holders. But I never truly understood it."

"It's mostly their fantasy. Submissives know what they want and the type of person they want to be dominated by. They know how they want to play, and if they want to be caged, or be treated as a pet, they'll find someone to do just that."

Khushi nodded in acknowledgement.

"The last submissive I had in here wanted this. When we first met, she told me she had to have that. She wanted to be treated as if she were my pet because that's how she liked to be dominated. The way she thought of it was that she was a little kitty."

"A kitty?"

Arnav nodded. "She even had a tail."

"A tail!"

"Yup. It's a butt plug with a furry tail."

Khushi couldn't help but to imagine herself naked with a tail, wearing a headband with cat-like ears.

She snapped out of thought. "What was it like with her?"

Arnav shrugged. "Typical. The day would start and I'd come here around 9 in the morning. She'd have to be awake, and she had to be trained to wake up at that time on her own without an alarm clock. I'd come in and give her breakfast. While she ate... I would pet her."

Khushi pursed her lips, understanding that by petting, it was something way beyond how you'd pet a kitty.

"How did that work?"

"Since she thought of herself as a kitty, she'd be given milk for breakfast. If she didn't finish by the time she..."

Khushi understood what he was trying to say.

"Then she wouldn't get anything to eat or drink for lunch. She'd stay trapped in here, since it was always kept locked unless I was here, and like a cat, she'd wander around the holder and would take kitty naps."

"When would you see her again?"

"Well, if she had finished her breakfast, I'd leave her lunch before leaving to work. And if she didn't, then I would just leave. I wouldn't come back till 6, unless I had work to deal with. When I would go to see her at that time, I would... relieve my stress," he said in a low voice.

Khushi pursed her lips and looked down.

"If she behaved, then she would be rewarded. If she didn't, then she would get punished."

"How did you punish her?"

"I wouldn't see her for a whole day. If I was in a good mood, I'd leave her a little something to eat and drink. Otherwise, she was on her own."

Khushi looked around the holder again. "What if she had to... you know... number one or two," Khushi said awkwardly.

"She had a litter box."

Khushi's eyes widened.

"But she wasn't really allowed to use it. When I would come to see her, I'd take her out and she'd go take care of her own business. But if she went before I came, she'd always have this guilty look on her face and she would get punished after she got cleaned up."

"Holy crap," Khushi breathed.

"It was her responsibility to take care of her mess. She had disobeyed me and she would be reminded of it while she took care of it."

Khushi held herself. 'What happened to her?"

"I gave her away."

Khushi scrunched her eyebrows. "What do you mean by gave her away?"

"I didn't want her anymore so I gave her away to someone I knew. He's the one who hooked me up with this place."

"What happened to them?"

"They got married and she's still his pet."

Khushi's mouth formed into an O.

"They're very happy. They're, and I quote, expecting our own litter of kitties."

"She's pregnant?"

Arnav nodded.

"What are they going to do after they have the baby?"

"That's up to them."

Khushi nodded in acknowledgement, then looked at him. "Why are you telling me all of this," she said softly.

"This way you'll know me."

"I already know you."

"Not all of me."

Khushi stepped forward and went over to Arnav. "I know enough."

"It's not enough for me."

Khushi tilted her head. "What do you expect to get out of this?"

Arnav didn't say anything and looked down.

"Arnav I've learned more about you than anyone else in the world. I don't need to know what you've done to your submissives in the past to understand you. Because I know that its what happened before all of this, that has made you who you are today." She caressed his face and tilted it up. "I love you and accept you just the way you are. I accept your past and I accept with what you've done. As long as you don't keep me trapped in here, I'm good," she smiled, trying to lighten up the mood.

"That's the thing Khushi - I could never do this to you." He reached out and cupped her face in his hands. "Ever since I realized that I loved you, I couldn't think of doing anything else, but loving you."

Khushi felt her heart melt.

"All this stuff I used to do - I don't need it anymore. The mere thought of doing this to you scares me. I don't want you to leave me. Ever again."

"And I won't," Khushi smiled softly. "You could tell me everything you've done with your past submissives, and it won't do a thing. Because I know that the difference between me and them is that you love me. You cared for them, yes, but of all the women you've met in your life, you've only loved me."

"And I always will."

Khushi smiled softly and kissed him. Arnav wrapped his arms around her, placing his hands on her back. Khushi entangled her fingers in his hair and sighed in content.

Arnav pulled away. "Let's get you home."

Khushi pulled back. "Oh crap, what time is it? The designer is coming today! And why didn't you tell me about it?"

"I'm sorry, I totally forgot. I've been... preoccupied."

"All this work will make you grow old quicker," Khushi teased.

Arnav smirked. "Let's go, young lady."

Khushi chuckled and followed Arnav back to the car. She took of his hat and placed it on her head.

"I have to admit, you look hot with Nigel's hat," Khushi said.

"Do I need to change Nigel's uniform?"

Khushi chuckled and sat in the passengers seat. "Nope. It just looks good on you."

"Me as a chauffeur - am I to assume role play?"

"Oh my god! Arnav," and she playfully hit his shoulder.

Arnav just chuckled, his boy-ish charm on display.

"By the way, why are you in a black suit? I'm pretty sure you were in navy blue this morning."

Arnav started up the car and drove. "I had to change. I had a little incident."

"Oh? Like what?"

Arnav reached out and held her hand. "Let's just say that the picture you sent me, did things to me."

Khushi patted herself on her shoulder. "Job well done Ms. Gupta."

Arnav glanced at her and Khushi noticed a gleam in his eyes. It instantly went away and Khushi couldn't help but to wonder what that was.

What was he thinking about?

Chapter Forty Five

Khushi taped up a cardboard box and plopped down in Arnav's chair with a sigh. "No more textbook rentals ever again!"

As it was finals week, Khushi was finally free from all the torture, having just finished her last test. As soon as she got back to the penthouse, she rounded up all her books in Arnav's home office, printed out receipts, and was ready to ship all her books back.

Khushi leaned forward and put her arms over the box. "If I see another textbook, I'm gonna vomit on it."

Etta came walking in with a duster. "Should I be worried," she chuckled.

"So long as I don't see one," Khushi winked.

"Well Mr. Raizada's are gone, so you won't see his. If you'd like, I can have Nigel take the box to UPS."

"Would he mind? I remember seeing on Arnav's calendar that an interior designer is coming?"

"Oh yes! Mr. Raizada must have forgotten! He had contracted a designer to redo the penthouse over the summer."

Khushi scrunched her eyebrows. "Hmm, he never mentioned it to me."

"He must have forgotten. After all there is only one thing, or rather one person on his mind these days," she smiled softly.

Khushi looked down, blushing softly. "So there's gonna be work done here over the summer."

"Yes, and I will make sure everything goes well."

"It's a good thing this place is big. That way I can avoid all that smell from paint and what not, holing myself up in a room. It makes me nauseous! The thought of it makes me wanna puke."

Etta chuckled. "You won't have to camp out in a room. Mr. Raizada probably won't be here."

Khushi tilted her head with a frown. "Really?"

Etta put her duster down and went over to Khushi. "He hasn't said anything?"

Khushi shook her head.

"Then maybe he has a surprise trip planned," Etta gushed.

Khushi took that into thought. A trip? How come he hasn't said anything about any of this?

"He's probably waiting for the right moment," Etta smiled.

"Well," Khushi sighed, glancing at the clock, "until then, considering all the time I've got till the designer comes over, I should drop off these books myself."

Etta smiled with a nod. "I'll put the box on the table in the foyer and let Nigel know to keep the car ready."

"Thanks Etta," Khushi smiled, heading to the door. "Can you believe how hot it is today. I just might faint," Khushi chuckled.

Etta chuckled. "All this talk about fainting and puking reminds me of when my sister got pregnant."

Khushi had just stepped out of the library when Etta said that, causing Khushi to pause. She looked back at Etta, but she was cleaning up Arnav's desk. Khushi turned away and quietly headed back to Arnav's room.

Vomiting? Fainting? Pregnant, Khushi exclaimed in her head.

Khushi paused in the gallery and looked into the bedroom. She thought of the night before and of other intimate moments with Arnav.

I can't be pregnant, Khushi thought. I've still got commencement and a career to start!

She went into the room and sat on the bed.

I am not pregnant! I'm just letting things get to my head! Arnav and I have always been careful, so there is no way!

Needing a distraction and a clear mind, Khushi took a quick shower. She got out of the shower and went over to the mirror to blow dry her hair. Just as she finished drying her hair, she saw her phone light up, playing the Kim Possible sound, alerting her of a text. She picked it up and saw that there was a text from Arnav.

I'm in a meeting with idiots

Please come here and distract me

Khushi smiled.

I'm not sure of what I could do xoxo

She headed to the dressing room to pick out a dress when her phone pinged.

I can think of a few ways ;)

She shook her head. Oh Arnav!

And what's that? xoxo

A response came immediately.

Come and find out ;)

Oh? Khushi decided to play a little game.

I'd love to cum but I have some things I need to take care of first xoxo

That should do the trick.

I know what you're trying to do angel

"Trying to do"? I've done nothing Sir, honest xoxo

Playing games won't help you angel

Is that so?

Playing games? Me? I would do no such thing! I'm just, let's say, tied up, with a few things xoxo

Khushi beamed as she sent the text. And as she expected, her phone pinged immediately.

Angel...

Khushi giggled as she let go of her towel, letting it drop to the floor.

What? *saying it innocently* Now stop bothering me, I have some errands to run and if you keep bothering me, I'll end up standing here all day, wet with no clothes on xoxo

"There we go. That ought to do it," Khushi smiled to herself.

She looked at her dresses and picked out a sleeveless royal blue shift dress. It was light enough for the hot weather, yet casual for when the designer came. Just as Khushi had unzipped the dress, her phone chimed.

I'm in a meeting with 6 other men here, and I'm hard as fuck!

Khushi burst into laughter, picturing the scenario in her head - Arnav sitting uncomfortably at the head of the table in the conference room, with 6 old men blabbing away in front of him.

Aww, poor you! xoxo

I keep having to readjust myself thanks to the picture in my head! Good thing everyone else is busy howling at each other

As for you angel, you're in trouble

Khushi grinned as she made her way to the bathroom and picked up the lotion. She went back into the dressing room and texted Arnav back.

Me? Whatever did I do? All I said was that I've got errands to run and that I'm naked. Now stop bothering me, I have to put lotion on xoxo

Fuck! Why are you torturing me?!

Khushi grinned, putting lotion on her arms.

Moi? xoxo

-_-

Khushi laughed, now focusing on her body.

Arnav, I'm only telling you what I'm currently doing. That's not a crime. I mean is it wrong of me to tell you that I'm putting lotion on my legs?

Khushi put her phone down and felt proud of herself. That definitely should do the trick!

Just as Khushi finished putting lotion on, her phone rang, displaying Arnav's picture. Khushi made the smile on her face disappear and tried to seem casual before she picked up the phone.

"Hello," she said casually.

"What the hell are you trying to do to me? I just had readjust myself again!"

"Um, aren't you in a meeting?"

"I excused myself to get a hold on you!"

"A hold on moi? Whatever for," she asked innocently.

"Angel," he said in a warning tone.

"And like an angel, I'm innocent! Not my fault if you can't take the facts like they are."

"Angel-"

"I mean come on Arnav! All I said was that rubbing lotion on my thighs. Is that so wrong," she said innocently.

Arnav took a sharp breath. "Angel, I know what you're trying to do-"

"And that would be nothing! Now hurry up, I need to put my clothes on so I can go out," she said, breaking into a smile, knowing how badly that would affect Arnav.

Arnav let out his breath. "You are going nowhere but here. My office. Now!"

Khushi sighed. "Sorry m'darling, can't. Errands to run, remember?"

"Angel I mean it-"

"Gotta go love, stores won't stay open forever. I love you, bye," and she hung up on him.

Feeling proud of herself, she gave herself a hug, patting herself on her shoulder.

That was just too fun!

Just as Khushi was about to put on her dress, her phone chimed.

This isn't over angel -_-

Khushi pursed her lips and an idea flew into her head. 

Once her plan was complete, Khushi headed out, holding the box full of textbooks in her hands. Nigel was waiting at the car and just as Khushi sat down, she responded to Arnav's text and sighed in content, smiling proudly.

Arnav's meeting had ended and he was finally alone, at his desk. His secretary had just gone off to lunch, leaving Arnav alone for a while. He took off his jacket and tie, and undid the top two buttons of his shirt. He decided to call Khushi again so he could finish up what she had started. Just as he picked up his phone it vibrated, displaying that he had gotten a text. He unlocked his phone and saw that it was a text from Khushi.

You're right, it isn't... and it never will be ;) xoxo

There was an image attached and Arnav's eyes widened. He tapped on it to enlarge it and his eyes almost fell out. The picture was of Khushi, sitting on a chair in the dressing room, her long hair falling in front of her shoulders, wearing nothing but a pair of black pumps, with her legs spread wide, one hand holding her phone to take the picture, while the other held the chair in between her legs, covering her most feminine part. 

Arnav let out a sharp breath as he stared at the picture. Although none of her intimate parts were exposed, Arnav felt his cock hardening, growing thick and heavy. He quickly rushed into the en-suite bathroom and placed his phone on the counter. He couldn't stand it another second and quickly undid his pants so he could relieve himself. His hand pumped over his cock while he screwed his eyes shut. He could visualize Khushi in front of him, sitting on a chair, touching herself, teasing him. Arnav grunted as he violently jerked his cock, unable to get that visual out of his head. Because of that, it didn't take long and he came violently, spurting out onto his clothes.

"Fuck," Arnav roared.

Arnav breathed heavily as he came down from his high, his clothes and hand completely messy. With his other hand, he ran it through his sweaty hair, tilting his head back. Arnav washed up his hands and face, then held onto the basin. He looked at his phone and stood up straight, looking into the mirror.

Arnav breathed heavily. "I will never let it end."

Chapter Forty Four

Khushi laid in bed, wide awake in the deep night. Arnav was laying on her chest, breathing lightly as he slept. She wondered how he could be sleeping so peacefully when her heart was still racing fast, thumping so hard as if it were trying to escape her chest. There was no way Khushi could calm herself down, especially after what they had just done. The thought of it sent tingles up her spine. Khushi felt her body come to life, her blood rushing south.

Suddenly Arnav groaned. He slowly lifted his head and looked at Khushi lazily with a smile.

"Thinking about earlier," he said, though it sounded more like a statement than a question.

Khushi blushed and nodded.

Suddenly, she felt a little twitch within her. Both Arnav and Khushi looked down at their connected bodies.

Khushi blushed and looked at him. "Round two?"

Arnav smiled. "I could go on to round infinity and would still never get enough of you."

Khushi blushed harder. She was grateful that the darkness hid that because Arnav's playful teases would have made it worse. Thoughts of their previous round flashed through her head once more and shivers went up her spine again. Arnav groaned and Khushi snapped out of her thought and looked at him.

"I love how you clench onto my cock," Arnav groaned.

Khushi gasped at his words and blushed harder. His words made her body hum and clench onto him again. Arnav moaned and shut his eyes, resting his head on Khushi's chest.

Khushi cupped his face and made him look at her. "Round two begins."

*~*

Khushi set her mug down as Arnav entered the TV room. She ogled him, taking in the crisp, three-piece navy blue colored suit he was wearing. Khushi made her way over to him and fixed his tie.

"Don't you look handsome this morning," Khushi smiled.

"It's just the face and the suit," Arnav simply said.

"Well I think the inside is handsome. Sexy, I might add," she winked.

Arnav cocked an eyebrow. "Really? Even after I gagged you and had tied you up to the posts of our bed last night?"

Khushi blushed on the spot, remembering back to that moment from the night before.

~

"Rule number three: reality is way more different than your books."

In the blink of an eye, Arnav picked her up, carrying her on his shoulder. Khushi made a sound out of surprise, but it was muffled by the gag. Arnav placed her down on the bed, laying her flat. Khushi gasped as she landed on her back. She gazed up at Arnav, wondering what he would do to her.

Arnav ran the back of his fingers down Khushi's cheek. "So beautiful," he said, though it seemed he was saying that more to himself.

His hand continued to wander down and Khushi shivered. When he reached her breasts, her hand reached out and caught his. Arnav cocked an eyebrow and looked down at her hand and then at Khushi.

Khushi gulped. But it tickles, she thought, though she did want to tell him that.

Arnav smirked and Khushi gulped once more. She could see something form in Arnav's eyes. It seemed dark and dangerous, yet exciting.

"Rule number four," Arnav said, "things go my way."

Arnav grabbed Khushi's hands and brought them up above her head. Khushi gasped, her back arching up, pushing her breasts upward. Arnav held her wrists in one hand and used his other hand to cup her breast.

Arnav looked straight into Khushi's eyes. "Mine," he growled.

He sealed his lips around her nipple and Khushi moaned. His other hand slowly moved its way down and cupped her womanhood. Khushi gasped once more, only to be cut of by Arnav sealing his lips over her other nipple.

"Mine," he growled again, running a finger through her cleft.

Khushi moaned, shutting her eyes at his tender touch.

Arnav licked Khushi's lower lip and bit it, getting another moan out of Khushi. He moved along her cheek and then moved to Khushi's ear.

"I'm going to tie you up angel," he whispered.

Khushi's eyes widened and she looked at him.

"I will leave you completely exposed to me."

Khushi blinked.

"Do you trust me?"

Khushi looked into his eyes and nodded.

"Good," Arnav smiled. He pulled back and got up. "Don't move."

Arnav walked away and Khushi stayed still. She wondered where Arnav had gone. Arnav came back into the room in a matter of seconds. He straddled Khushi and held four of her scarves in his hands.

"Time to tie you up," he grinned.

Arnav moved her so that she was laying in the middle of the bed.

"Arms up."

Khushi did as he said and raised her arms. Arnav took hold of her left hand and extended her arm fully out. Arnav took a scarf and wrapped it around the bedpost. He brought it forth and crisscrossed it and wrapped it around Khushi's wrist. Khushi held the scarf and watched as Arnav tied her wrists.

"Okay," he asked, checking if its not to tight.

Khushi nodded.

Arnav did same with her other hand and then he extended and spread Khushi's legs out. He tied them up to the posts as well, then he stood up and admired his handiwork.

"Beautiful," he breathed.

Khushi reddened. She began to breath heavily, feeling the urge to cover herself from embarrassment, yet at the same time, she felt sexy and wanted him to gaze away at her.

Arnav walked along the side of the bed, skimming his fingers over her body. Khushi felt ticklish and began to squirm, but she couldn't move away from Arnav's touch.

"You have such soft skin," he muttered, more to himself.

His fingers skimmed over stomach and around the swell of her breast. Khushi shuddered again and pulled on her restraints.

"Control it angel," Arnav said softly.

Arnav sat down beside Khushi and cupped her cheek. "There will be moments when you will want me to stop but won't mean it due to its intensity. So I want you to use your signal carefully. Understood?"

Khushi nodded.

"What's your signal?"

Khushi pointed her ring finger and pinky finger up.

"Good girl."

Arnav unbuttoned his pants and Khushi gulped. He smirked and went around to the foot of the bed. Khushi raised her head to see him, but Arnav told her to stay still. Pulling his shirttails out, he unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it aside. He got rid of his pants, as well his briefs. He crawled on top of Khushi and she looked at him with wide eyes, wondering how much longer he was going to tease her. 

Arnav smirked and looked down at his hand, which was gliding along her front. "Depends - how long would you like me to tease you?"

Khushi gasped. How'd he know, she wondered.

Arnav smiled and kissed her forehead. "I always know, angel."

His sentence made her smile but the gag was in the way. But Arnav could tell by the gleam in her eyes. He brushed the back of his hand on her cheek, gazing at her passionately.

"I will never let you go," he said absentmindedly. 

Khushi's heart melted and she looked at him with the same amount of passion until his eyes gleamed mischievously.

"I'll tie you up like this if I have to," he said, looking down her body. "You're mine, angel. Only mine," he said running his hand along her body. "No one else can have what's mine and that most definitely means that no one can ever have you. Is that understood?"

Khushi nodded.

Arnav cocked his eyebrow. "Do you?"

Khushi nodded again.

Arnav tilted his head. "I don't think you fully understand," he said, swirling his finger tip over her nipple.

Khushi moaned. "I do," she tried to say, but the gag muffled her words.

Arnav chuckled. "What's that angel," he asked innocently, trailing his fingers down to her stomach. "I didn't quite get that," he said, his hand still going lower.

Khushi moaned and shut her eyes, tossing her head back when Arnav's hand had reached her womanhood. Arnav watched her as he slipped his finger within her, his finger sliding right in. Khushi groaned and pulled on her restraints. Unfortunately for her, Arnav had tied them tightly and securely, so she wasn't going anywhere. Arnav groaned when she clenched around his finger.

"Greedy, aren't you," Arnav teased.

Khushi whimpered, desperate for him.

"Would you rather have my cock inside you than my finger," he asked innocently.

Khushi's insides clenched and she nodded.

"Now or later," he teased.

Khushi groaned in frustration and pulled on her restraints, wanting to urge him inside her.

Arnav chuckled. "Greedy and desperate. My, my angel, you're not so innocent."

Khushi whimpered and tried to pout.

"No pouting angel," he admonished.

Khushi whimpered and arched her back.

"Should I assume that means now," he asked, teasing her even more.

Khushi nodded desperately.

Arnav brought his face over hers. "Fine."

He reached out to the side table and pulled a drawer open to get a condom out. Placing it on, he didn't waste a moment and plunged into her. Khushi groaned, clenching her eyes shut as he entered. With each each thrust, she felt him hit the top, as if he were hitting the bottom of her stomach. She wanted to hold him and wanted to wrap her legs around him, but she was trapped. She felt an orgasm coming and she attempted to clench her legs shut, but she couldn't. Orgasm after orgasm rippled from her, screams of ecstasy muffled by the gag. After her fourth orgasm, Arnav removed the gag and covered her lips with his. Their tongues met and again she came, her scream muffled by their kiss.

"Arnav," she breathed.

Arnav brought his hand under her head and cupped it. With his other hand, he untied her right hand and Khushi instantly entangled it within his hair. Arnav leaned his forehead against hers and thrusted with all his might and within seconds, both came crashing down from their high. They panted, the air filled with the smell of sex and sweat.

"Gosh, I love you so much," Arnav breathed.

"And I love you too," Khushi replied, holding onto him tightly.

~

"Yes," she breathed, clenching her thighs.

Arnav had noticed that and he picked her up and seated her on the desk, standing in between her legs.

"I see the memories of last night are still affecting you," Arnav noted.

Khushi wrapped her arms around Arnav's neck. "Memories of our first night still affect me. The most, actually," she admitted, blushing.

Arnav cocked his eyebrow. "Is that so?"

Khushi nodded.

Arnav smirked. "That means I did something right that night."

Khushi giggled. "That you definitely did."

Arnav sighed. "I love hearing you laugh."

Khushi smiled softly.

"And when you scream my name," he smirked.

Khushi gasped. "You have no shame," she mocked.

Arnav chuckled and moved to her ear. "I also love how you greedily clench onto my cock."

Khushi crimsoned. "Arnav," she exclaimed, pulling back and hitting his shoulder.

Arnav only chuckled while Khushi hid her face behind her hands. Arnav glanced at the clock behind her and saw that he had time to spare.

"I've got twenty minutes to spare," he stated.

Khushi looked up at him. "You do?"

Arnav nodded and she looked back at the clock.

She glanced at him then back at the clock. "Any idea in mind on how to pass time?"

Arnav pulled her lower half to his. "I do," he said, his erection digging into her stomach.

"Well then, in that case...."

Khushi looked at him innocently while she loosened his belt and unbuttoned his pants.

"Let's not waste anytime," she winked.

"Angel," he gasped mockingly.

Khushi chuckled and laid back on the desk. "Tick tock Mr. Raizada."

Arnav chuckled. "Tick tock-" but he stopped himself.

Khushi looked at him curiously.

Arnav smiled. "Tick tock indeed," and he sealed her lips with his.

Chapter Forty Three

"You can be such a passionate lover," Khushi smiled softly.

Khushi was on her side, facing Arnav. They held their hands up, playing and entangling their fingers together. They were cocooned up under Khushi's sheets, the setting sun's light pouring into the room.

"Though I would also like for you to be a controlling lover," Khushi blushed.

The corner of Arnav's lips crooked up. He entangled his fingers with hers, then tugged on her, bringing Khushi over him.

"A controlling lover." he questioned.

Khushi ran her nose along his. "Mm hmm."

Arnav sighed, running his hand along her back. "Angel..."

"I trust you baby."

"I know," he said softly.

Khushi laid her head down on his chest and Arnav continued to run his finger tips along Khushi's back.

"You offered to do it though," Khushi said softly. She tilted her head up and rested her chin on his chest. "I'm not trying to be pushy or anything... I was just saying what you said."

Arnav smiled. "I know, angel, I know. But...."

"But?"

"That was before you knew about...."

Khushi leaned up and cupped his face. "It doesn't change anything."

Arnav could only blink.

"I know you're afraid of being that dominant you once were, but there's another part of you now - the part that knows of love, that loves me. I know that you would never intentionally hurt me."

"I don't want to loose you," Arnav said with a shaky voice.

"You won't baby, I promise," and she gave him a kiss.

Arnav caressed her face and looked at her. "We should get up - your pad thai is waiting."

Khushi chuckled. "I'm sure it is," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"Well let's go check," and he spanked her, getting a yelp out of her.

Khushi's eyes widened and she beamed. "Yay!"

Arnav chuckled and he picked her up and took her to the living room. He placed her down on the breakfast bar and Khushi pecked his lips and gazed at Arnav's fine ass as he walked to the door.

Damn, I'm lucky, Khushi said in her head.

Arnav slightly opened the door and poked his head out. No one was there, but their takeout hung on the doorknob. He took it and shut the door behind him and placed the bag in front of Khushi.

"I'm surprised they left it," Khushi said, cocking her eyebrow as Arnav placed the bag down.

Arnav's lips crooked up.

"They basically left it for anyone to take it - that's bad. You should leave a bad review," Khushi said, crossing her arms.

"Oh? And what should I say? They have good food and it has impeccable taste, and their delivery boy leaves your takeout on your doorknob when he hears you and your girlfriend having loud, intimate sex?"

Khushi went red.

"That's a wonderful review," Arnav teased.

"You think he heard us," Khushi crimsoned.

"Better not have - I won't let the fucker live if he heard you. That music is only for my ears," Arnav winked.

Khushi looked down as the embarrassment took her. Arnav chuckled and wrapped his arms around her. Khushi held him, wrapping her legs around him.

"Hungry," Arnav questioned softly.

Khushi nodded and pulled back. 

Arnav released her and got their food out. It was still warm and him and Khushi were fine with that. They brought everything down to the floor and Khushi decided to wear Arnav's shirt so that she could eat in peace.

Don't come in between a girl and her food with sex - food will win... unless it's sex involving food.

"Cold," Arnav questioned.

"No, I'm fine, thank you."

Arnav smiled softly and nodded. They remained on the floor, eating and laughing the day away.

*~*

Two days had passed since their trip to Khushi's place. Khushi was folding up her clothes in the dressing room when her phone pinged. She saw that there was a text from Arnav. 

I'll be home in 10. Be ready for me ;)

Khushi felt butterflies in her stomach. For some reason, she felt nervous yet excited.

He's finally going to do it, she said in her head.

Etta came in with the last of Arnav's just-ironed shirts. Khushi sent her home and once Etta left, Khushi stripped out of her clothes. She kicked them aside and entered their bedroom. Glancing around the room, she decided to wait in the corner, so she went there, waiting on her knees. 

Khushi could hear footsteps coming her way. She felt excitement pit in her belly as she heard Arnav come closer. Arnav came walking in, loosening his tie. He noticed Khushi out of the corner of his eyes and smiled softly. She was looking down, hands on her knees, completely quiet.

Eager as ever, Arnav chuckled to himself.

He walked up in front of her and stood there for a moment.

I truly am in awe of you. I love you my sweet, impatient angel, he smiled.

Without a word, he stepped away and headed to the wardrobe in the dressing room. While Arnav took out some items, Khushi was peeking up at the doorway, wondering what he was up to. When she heard him approaching, she quickly looked back down.

Arnav came back into the room and placed the items in his hands on the bed. Khushi heard as the items dropped onto the bed.

What could he be up to, Khushi wondered. 

"Rise."

At his simple demand, Khushi stood up and didn't dare to look at him.

"You're going to be receiving some lessons," he said, walking up to Khushi with an item in his hands.

Khushi scrunched her eyebrows and looked up at him. "But I-"

Arnav looked at her and that one glance shut Khushi up in a second and had her looking back down. She saw the item in his hand and was somewhat confused as to what it was.

"Rule number one: don't talk unless you're told to."

Arnav raised his hand and showed the item to Khushi - a bit gag.

Khushi's eyes widened and she gulped.

"Do you trust me?"

Khushi looked at him. "More than myself."

Arnav smiled softly. He placed the the bit in Khushi's mouth and Khushi bit down onto it. He put on the straps behind her head and looked back at her.

"This bit gag is a breathable gag. Since you're a beginner, this will help train you for a regular bit gag or ball gag. Now if you feel that you can't take it anymore, then point both your ring finger and your pinky on both hands. Understood?"

Khushi tried to speak but she couldn't, so instead, she nodded.

"Positive? "

Khushi nodded.

"Good. Rule number two: when you wait for me, I want you on your knees but don't place your hands on your knees, but behind your back. Understood?"

Khushi nodded. 

"Good. Rule number three: reality is way more different than your books."

Chapter Forty Two

All was well as the days passed. Arnav started to open up more and he'd share moments of his past. He even watched the old VHS tapes with Khushi down in the media room, his blanky by his side. Now and then, Arnav would get emotional, but Khushi was always there to support him.

A couple of days had passed and Khushi was putting away some of Arnav's clothes (after begging Etta to let her do some work) when her phone dinged. She took it out of her back pocket to see Arnav had texted her:

Thought of you all day

Can't wait to see you when I get home

;)

Khushi smiled shyly. Geez, I feel like newlywed-bride-! A bride?! Me?

Khushi thought for a moment, picturing herself in wedding attire, making pheras with Arnav.

Oh my... that would be....

Khushi shook the image away and continued to put Arnav's suits away.

My mind wanders off to much, Khushi blushed. Finish school and get a job - then think about marriage stupid, she scolded at herself.

She finished up with her work and glanced at the clock. In about ten minutes, Arnav would be home. He had a dinner conference with some company which Khushi had no idea about. As much as Arnav had wanted to cancel it, Khushi had told him that work came first and that it was okay if she ate alone now and then. Of course, Arnav got fussy like a little kid, but Khushi knew how to handle him.

Hmm... hope he doesn't act childish when he gets home. A small grin grew on her face. My baby.

Khushi glanced at the clock once more and then an idea came to her head.

I know!

*~*

"Angel, I'm home," Arnav called out.

He came walking through the gallery and into his room and rooted himself to the floor. His jaw dropped as he gaped at Khushi, who was in the corner, on her knees, legs spread, hands on her thighs, head bowed down, completely naked.

"Angel what are you..." but Arnav was too shocked.

Khushi looked up at him through her eyelashes. "I want to play," she said softly.

Arnav stayed quiet, pursing his lips.

"Please baby?"

But Arnav was unsure.

"I trust you."

Arnav shut his eyes, letting her words go through him.

"Please?"

Arnav opened his eyes and came down to the floor. "I... Angel, I'm not sure if I want to do this now."

"Why," Khushi asked, feeling somewhat sad.

"Right now... I just don't want to do it."

"I don't understand," Khushi said softly.

"Khushi, you're my girlfriend," Arnav said, cupping her face. "You're not my submissive - there's a difference."

"But there are so many people out there who have girlfriends that are their submissives. Even married couples! The wives are submissives!"

"I know-"

"Then why?"

Arnav looked down for a moment. "I don't trust myself."

Khushi gasped. "Arnav that's not good-"

"I know."

Both stayed quiet for a moment, staying in that position. After a moment, Arnav picked Khushi up and took her to bed. He placed her down and went into the bathroom to get her robe. He had her wear it and he tied the sash securely.

"Let's take things slow," Arnav said softly.

"But things have been going slow. We've crossed so many barriers."

"I know," Arnav said softly.

Khushi held his hands. "Don't be afraid Arnav. Everything will be fine between us."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because I love you."

Arnav looked down.

"And I believe in you, baby. So what if we're not like everyone else and their lovey-dovey relationship - we're unique this way."

Arnav scoffed lightly. "We're unique with me putting you on display on my X-frame?"

"Yes," Khushi blushed, envisioning herself on the X-frame.

Arnav looked at her for a moment. "I would like that too."

Khushi smiled softly. "I've always wondered what it would be like to be on one of those."

Arnav's lips crooked up. "Angel, you're not so innocent."

Khushi grinned. "No, I'm not. Every girl has some inner desire within them. Once I learned of my wants, I felt shy and embarrassed by it, and never thought I could tell anyone. But now that I have you, the man that I love, why hide anything from you? This is my dirty, secret desire and I want you to fulfill it, especially when you have the ability to."

Arnav smiled softly and picked Khushi up onto his lap. "I love you, Angel."

"I love you, baby."

"We won't hide any secrets from each other," Arnav said, burying his face in her hair.

"We won't," Khushi said softly.

You're lying to him, and eerie voice whispered from inside.

I know, Khushi replied. And I don't know for how long.

*~*

Arnav and Khushi were happy, going on with their lives. Graduation was right around the corner and the couple couldn't wait!

The weekend arrived and they had decided that they would go to Khushi's apartment. Arnav decided to order takeout, so he got on his phone to use the grubhub app. Khushi was sorting through the mail and checked her messages on the land line. The first few were pointless messages, until she got to the last one. The last message began to play when Arnav entered the room.

"Angel I-"

"Khushi?"

Khushi looked down at the phone. It was her mother.

"Khushi?"

Khushi inhaled sharply. Papa, she said in her head.

"Sweetheart, we've missed you so much," her mother said. "It's been so many years. We miss you so much, darling."

"We want to see you," her father said. "We were wrong and we admit that. We just want to see you darling. We miss you so much."

Khushi bit her lip and Arnav looked at her.

"We all miss you," her mother continued. "Your father and I miss you so much dear! Please, call us back. Please? We miss you so much dear," she sobbed. "We-"

The message ended since it was only supposed to be a few seconds long. Khushi looked away, trying to control her emotions. Pursing her lips, she hit the "Delete" button and turned away. Arnav was surprised. He had never heard Khushi say a thing about her parents, let alone her family. Moving behind her, Arnav wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her shoulder, feeling her shudder.

"I haven't seen them in years," Khushi whispered, trying her best not to shed her tears.

Arnav had already known that because back when he had first met Khushi, he had gotten some background information on her. He had seen that she had lived alone for many years and she paid for all her utilities. Her outgoing calls from her land line were mostly to her friends or work, but never to her parents.

"What happened between you and your parents, Angel," Arnav asked softly.

Khushi didn't reply. She remained quiet, wondering what she should say. As for Arnav, he didn't like how she wasn't responding.

"Khushi, you know everything about me. Won't you tell me everything about you? I have the right to know," he said softly.

Khushi sighed and looked down. "A couple of years ago... my parents had wanted me to get married."

Arnav's eyebrows shot up.

"They felt that it wasn't necessary for me to go on with my education. So they had found some random guy and tried to get me to meet him, but instead I fought them and ran away. I left them and got help from the university. At the time I had only been accepted and was going to commute, but once I told them of my situation, they helped me go to court and gain my independence from my parents."

"And you lost all relations with them."

Khushi nodded. "Since I didn't have much income on my own, I ended up not having to pay for school at all, my financial aid covering it all for me."

Arnav nodded, already knowing this from some of the information he already had on her.

"Well I understand why you did it," Arnav said. "And I'm glad you did."

Khushi looked at him. "Really?"

Arnav nodded. "Otherwise I wouldn't have my angel," he smiled.

Khushi smiled and turned to face him. "How true," and she gave him a kiss.

The buzzer rang and the couple split.

"The takeout is here," Khushi whispered.

"The pad thai can wait," Arnav replied, and he took her towards the bedroom.

Khushi bit her lip. "You make that sound so hot," she moaned.

Arnav smirked and he sealed her lips, taking him and his angel to another world.

As for the takeout guy, well...

*Knock!*Knock!*Knock!*

"Anybody home," he hollered. "I've got two chicken pad thais, edammame, and two steak salads, as well as two thai iced teas for Arnav Singh Raizada!"

But all he got for a reply were grunting and moaning.

He blushed. "Oh, um, in that case, I'll just leave it here," and he left the bag hanging on the doorknob, and ran.

Chapter Forty One

"Why didn't you take me in your playroom," Khushi asked.

They were laying down in bed, Khushi on Arnav's front, their fingers twisted in with the other's.

Arnav didn't reply and Khushi was curious. She turned in his hold to look at him and found him staring at her.

"Well," Khushi pushed on.

Arnav sighed deeply. "Because things are different now."

"What do you mean?"

Arnav turned them over and he laid her beside him. "I've changed, Khushi. I'm not the same man I was before I met you."

Khushi caressed his face and Arnav snuggled into her embrace.

"I want to though."

"Want to what," Khushi asked, her eyebrows scrunched.

"Have you in that room. Do with you as I wish. But...."

"But what?"

Arnav didn't say anything and looked down.

"You can tell me Arnav," Khushi said softly.

Arnav remained quiet for a moment and then looked up at her. "I'm scared."

"Why," she asked softly.

"Of being the man I once was with you."

"What do you mean?"

Arnav sighed. "Khushi, before you came into my life, I was nothing more than a ruthless business man and a domineering dominant. I was cold and I was rough."

"But-"

"You were right, when you asked me if it was harsh of me to put my subs in the closet. And the truth is that it was. It was meant to be because I would get very irritated. Because it was in our contract, I had the ability and every right to do it. They wanted that and that's what they got.

"Khushi, I've not only locked women up in the closet, but in cages, boxes, dungeons, you name it."

Khushi's eyes widened. Holy crap, she thought.

Arnav sat up and looked down at his lap. "There was time when I was very proud of all of this. In our hidden society, I was the best Dom around. Women were at my feet, desperate to be my sub, but I didn't just take anyone. I was hard and rough and I needed a woman who could that. One that would tolerate all the shit I gave them. Though it never surprised me by the number of women that could actually take it," he scoffed lightly.

Khushi blinked and then she sat up beside him. Arnav glanced at her and took her hand in his and placed it in his lap.

"Telling you these things now... it's just... I feel embarrassed. With you... everything's different now. After my mother's death, the idea of love became completely fake to me. It was all bullshit to me. But then you came into my life," he said, looking up at her.

"The moment you stepped into my life, I could see myself changing. I stopped smoking weed, stopped with the excessive drinking... I wasn't the ruthless Dom I once was. But the moment you told me you loved me...."

"You were scared," Khushi said softly.

Arnav looked up at her.

"You were afraid. It wasn't just that you didn't believe in it but you didn't trust it. After seeing what happened between your parents, the idea of love was fake to you. And because your loving mother left you, you felt deceived by love and couldn't trust it. That's why when I told you that I loved you, you got scared. You didn't want to be deceived once more."

Arnav looked down and nodded. "And that's why I tried so hard to be the person I once was. I succeeded somewhat but I was always held back slightly. But that night... when I forced myself on you...."

Khushi looked down, reflecting back to that night.

Arnav looked at her and held her other hand. "Khushi you have to believe that I by no means meant to harm you. I was just beyond angry that you knew everything and thought that you thought I was weak and fucked up in the head. At that moment, I became who I really was and my anger got the best of me and when I usually got mad, I would fuck it out. That's why I did it and I forgot that you weren't my sub, and acted how I did with you the way I did with them."

"You'd force yourself on them?"

"Not exactly. In our contract, it was stated that whenever I wanted to have sex, they would have to agree. I had it clearly stated that I could be fierce when I was angry, but they all agreed. Not once did they ever complain - they all found a lot of pleasure in it. But you... when I saw those tears...."

Arnav turned away, completely ashamed of himself. "I let the devil inside get hold of me that night and I could never forgive myself for it."

"Arnav, no, don't," Khushi said, reaching out to caress his cheek.

"What I did was wrong," he said, his eyes screwed shut and his hands clenched into fists.

"Arnav stop," Khushi said, holding his hands. "Please, stop-"

"How can you still be with me," Arnav asked, turning back to face her.

Khushi gasped. Gone was the great, handsome, sexy CEO Arnav, and here was the broken, horrified, miserable Chote.

"I acted like a monster with you, but yet you're still here. I'm a broken man Khushi, but yet you're still here! How?!"

"Arnav-"

"I'm fucked up as hell Khushi! I've gone through years of therapy but that shit has never done anything, no matter what type I've done! How are you still with me?! For fuck's sake, I saw my mother's dead body hanging from a ceiling fan!!! I'm scarred for the rest of my life, but you're treating me like I have no shit to deal with! Why? Why are you with me?"

Khushi just looked at him, tears in her eyes. "Because I know that underneath that great CEO, there is a normal man. Because I know that under that rough and harsh dominant that locks up his submissives, there's a man only looking for love and trying to figure out why he was punished and ridden of it at a young age. Because I know that even though you saw your dead mother's corpse hanging and have been scarred, you are fighting everyday to get past that and to be the strong man that you really are so that you can love me."

Arnav gaped at her.

"Don't you get it Arnav," Khushi asked, cupping his face in his hands. "I believe in you. I know that under all the fucked up-ness, there is a true person beneath in search of love. While the world sees you as a man of money and power, and a secret society sees you as a mighty dominant, I see a boy  underneath all those layers, who wants nothing but to be loved! He wants to feel special and get the love that he deserves. He's angry at the world for stealing his mama away from him, so he takes it out on everyone else."

Tears came streaming down Arnav's cheeks.

"But it's okay," Khushi soothed, wiping away his tears. "You don't have to act all mighty. I get it - you had a tragic childhood and it mentally affected you." She held his hands. "It's okay, my love. You were stripped of the love you deserved and I'm going to give it to you. It may not be your mother's love, but it'll still be a form of love."

"Angel," Arnav whispered, his voice cracking.

"Oh baby, come here," and Arnav went into her arms and cried.

It hurt Khushi to see him like this but she knew it was necessary. For years,  Arnav had held his emotions in and it let it take form in anger. That's why he he was a ruthless business man. That's why he was the powerful dominant. But right now, he needed to be the boy who couldn't even cry at his mother's funeral.

After Arnav had calmed down, Khushi had him lay down and told him to sleep. She went to leave him alone, but Arnav reached out and held her hand. 

"Stay by my side," Arnav whispered, pleading.

Khushi smiled softly and nodded, and she sat down beside him. Arnav moved closer and laid his head on her lap and shut his eyes. Khushi moved her fingers through his hair, soothing him as he fell asleep.

*~*

It had been an hour since Arnav had fallen asleep. Khushi had remained by his side though and watched him sleep. 

Oh, my beautiful but broken man, Khushi said in her head.

Arnav's phone buzzed, causing Arnav to stir. She quickly reached over to the night stand and picked his phone up. She saw that it was someone named Dr. Thomas Rickman calling and she wondered who this man was. The person called again and Khushi wondered if she should wake up Arnav. Looking at him, she felt it wrong to do that, so she carefully lifted Arnav's head and placed it on the pillow. He had stirred a bit, but he didn't wake up.

Getting up, Khushi went out to the terrace. She looked at Arnav's phone and saw that the person had stopped calling. Putting it on silent, she placed it in her back pocket. Leaning against the rail, Khushi gazed out at the city below her.

We've come so far, she thought. I love him too much that it would break me to leave him. The thought of it makes me.... He loves me and he needs me just as much as I need him. We both have our demons to fight and we can do it together.

But you haven't even told him yours, an eerie voice whispered inside of her.

Khushi's eyes widened. No, I haven't... but... should I tell him? What will he think?

He'll understand, a soft voice replied in her head.

It's not as fucked up as his, a snarky voice said.

Khushi shook her head clear of the voices. I have to tell him, it's only fair. I know his story-

Because Anjali told you, the snarky one piped up. 

Khushi shook her away. Well I have no one to tell him so I have to tell him....

Suddenly Khushi heard a cry coming from the room. She ran back in and found Arnav tossing and turning, crying out in his sleep.

Oh no, Khushi thought.

Khushi went running to his side and tried to shake him awake. 

"Arnav," she called out. "Arnav wake up please!"

Arnav writhed, his eyes screwed tightly shut covered up in sweat. 

"Baby, wake up please!"

She tugged on Arnav some more when his eyes shot open. He breathed heavily, his chest heaving. His shirt was wet from sweat and his eyes were wide.

"Arnav, are you okay," Khushi asked, cupping his face.

Arnav sat up immediately and hugged Khushi tightly. "Bad dream," he huffed over and over again.

"Shh, I'm right here baby," Khushi soothed. "Right here."

For a moment, they stayed like that. Khushi soothed Arnav with sweet nothings and Arnav calmed down. He pulled back and Khushi reached over to wipe the sweat off of his face.

"Are you okay," Khushi asked softly. 

Arnav nodded. "Yeah," he replied. "I'm fine."

"You haven't had a nightmare in so long."

Arnav nodded and looked down at his hands in his lap.

"You wanna tell me what it's about," Khushi asked softly, cupping his face.

Arnav debated for a second. Usually after having a bad dream, he would have sex to get over it. But if he wanted things to be different and be the changed man he was, he would have to refrain from doing so. So instead, he laid down in her lap. Khushi placed one arm around him and he held onto her hand over his thumping heart.

"It usually starts different," Arnav began.

Khushi moved her free hand through his hair to comfort him. 

"They're moments of the past, moments I've had with mom."

"Like what," Khushi asked softly.

"Like when Ma would help me with my homework, when she would feed me, when she would play with me... there's so many moments," he sighed.

Arnav stayed quiet for a moment and Khushi didn't push him. 

"I like it when my favorite memories play. Like this one time when we all went to McDonald's and mom accidentally got ketchup spurting on her face... or the time she was watering the garden and I stepped on the hose on purpose. Di took the hose from her, saying that she could fix it and I removed my foot and water blasted on her face and she chased me while mom laughed really hard at our crazy antics."

Khushi smiled softly, picturing a little boy running around over lush, green grass, with his beautiful mother laughing away.

"My most favorite was when I surprised her with a really nice necklace on her birthday. It took all of my allowance money and a lot of hard work not to be tempted to spend it on candy." Arnav sighed. "Mommy was so happy."

Arnav stayed quiet for a moment and Khushi continued to run her fingers through his really soft hair.

"Every night,  I would go to her room and kiss mommy goodnight, saving her the trip to my room. Mommy would be getting ready for bed and try to make her way to my room, but I always beat mommy," he smiled.

Khushi smiled softly. 

Arnav chuckled a bit. "You know, mommy always said that one day she'd get to my room first, but I always beat her and got to her room first. I always told mommy she'd never win, but she never gave up."

Khushi couldn't help but to smile. She wasn't listening to Arnav - she was listening to Chote speak.

"Silly mommy," Arnav chuckled. "She had promised she would win... but she never got that chance," he said, his voice now a mere whisper.

Khushi pursed her lips. She could feel Arnav's body get tense.

"They all end the same," Arnav said softly. "After the memory it starts with, it ends with me going to mommy's room. I make my way to her room to say good night. When I open the door, the room is dark. It's weird because mommy never has the lights off at this time. So I reach to the side to turn the lights on and...."

Khushi gulped, getting the feeling she knew exactly what he saw next.

"I see her hanging," Arnav whispered, his eyes wide and filled fear. "Mommy's hanging from her scarf tied to the ceiling fan. I stand there, completely shocked. It only takes a moment and then everything clicks in my head."

For a moment, it felt like Arnav had stopped breathing.

"I scream," Arnav said plainly. "Very loud. I run. I go to mommy and grab her around her legs, trying to pick her up but mommy is heavy. Di comes running in. She screams and cries as she comes forward to help me. We both try, but mommy is heavy. She leaves me to grab scissors and jumps on mommy's bed to cut the scarf. She tries and tries till mommy comes falling down. We both are on mommy's side, yelling and crying, but she's quiet - mommy doesn't say a word. Her eyes are shut...."

Khushi bit her lip, picturing the scene in her head, seeing a horrified little boy, crying for his mother to get up.

"Di runs to the phone and calls 911. I yell, begging mommy to get up. That I'll go back to my room so that she can say goodnight to me first, but mommy won't listen, mommy won't get up. Di is by my side again and she holds me, crying and telling me mommy won't get up ever again, that she left us."

Tears swelled up in Khushi's eyes and she tried really hard not to let them fall.

"I just stared at mommy, thinking she was mad at me. People came bursting in soon and they took us away. I just watched, completely quiet. I watched them get around mommy. They took us away and I couldn't see mommy anymore." Arnav pauses for a moment. "The next time I saw mommy, she was in white. She was was on a whole bunch of logs...."

Khushi felt him tense up again.

"He was suppose to burn her."

Khushi assumed he meant his father.

"I couldn't let him. It was his fault. So I yelled at him. I insulted him."

Arnav's body shook with anger.

"I burned mommy that day. I watched mommy burn before my eyes and I couldn't so anything about it. Mommy was dead... and it was his fault."

Arnav suddenly sat up and gripped onto the sheets.

"My mommy is gone and it's all his fault. For years I thought I was at fault but.... She's... he... and I thought I... mommy," and Arnav broke into tears, covering his face with hands.

Khushi's tears escaped and came flowing down. She wrapped her arms around Arnav and Arnav buried his face in her neck, holding onto her as his tears flowed.

"My mommy is gone and I thought it was really my fault in the end," Arnav cried.

Khushi ran her fingers through his hair to sooth him. 

She held him tightly and kissed him on his head. "It's not your fault Arnav. It never has been and you know that now."

Arnav nodded, still crying in her arms.

"It's okay baby, it's okay," Khushi soothed. She placed a kiss on his head. "Your angel will take care of you now."

Arnav tilted his head up to look at him and Khushi wiped his tears away. 

"If there's any reason why I'm in your life, then it's because your mother wants me to. She chose me to be your angel and to be by your side. I will love you Arnav, and I will take care of you, just like your mommy did. I promise baby, I will."

"Angel," Arnav breathed, and he brought her lips down to kiss her.

Khushi kissed him back with all her love.

"You'll stay with me," Arnav asked, murmuring on her lips.

"Forever," Khushi confirmed.