No one had ever seen Arnav Singh Raizada crack and be in tears. Only those who were close to him had seen him in tears. Now that Khushi had seen him in that state, he wondered if Khushi thought of him as weak and childish for crying so much.
Getting up, he washed up in the bathroom. He headed downstairs to the kitchen and saw Khushi digging into her pancakes and hash-browns. She was about to take a sip of her OJ when she saw Arnav at the doorway. Arnav flushed slightly, still feeling embarrassed that Khushi had seen him in that state the night before. He came walking in and sat on the stool next to Khushi and Etta placed his breakfast and left to do other chores. Arnav dug right in, not daring to look at Khushi.
"How are you feeling," Khushi asked softly.
Arnav paused mid-chew. "Better."
Khushi nodded and ate more of her hash-brown. "What are you doing today?"
"I'm gonna be at the office. ... keep myself busy with work and what not.... You?"
"I'll be out, not sure doing what," she lied.
"Okay," he replied, believing her.
The two ate in silence for moment, when Arnav spoke.
"Khushi, I want you to forget everything that happened last night."
Khushi simply nodded, but she totally ignored what he asked of her. She knew he was embarrassed - it was crystal clear, written all over his face.
The two finished up their breakfast and headed upstairs to get ready for their day. Arnav left for the office and Khushi took the subway and headed on over to Anjali's place at Bay Ridge. Ringing the doorbell, she waited for someone to open the door. The door opened, revealing Arhat.
"Namaste," Khushi smiled timidly.
"Namaste," Arhat smiled back. "Come in."
Arhat took Khushi into the living where they both sat down.
"How are you," Arhat asked.
"I'm well, thank you for asking."
Arhat smiled lightly. "So what brings you here?"
"Um, I came to see Anjali."
"Oh. Well I'm afraid she's gone outside."
"Oh..."
Arhat just nodded.
Khushi pursed her lips. She had come here to talk to Anjali so she could learn more about their mother, but now that Anjali wasn't here, she would have to change her tactics.
"Mr. Raizada, I was wondering if you could help me."
"Of course child, what is it?"
Here goes, she said in her head. "I was wondering if... if you could tell me about Arnav's mother."
Arhat's eyes slightly widened, but Khushi didn't miss it.
"Well," Khushi pushed.
Arhat looked down at his hands. "There's so much that can be said about her, but if anything... then it's that I loved her very much."
"Then why did you cheat on her?"
Arhat closed his eyes for a moment and then looked at Khushi. "I never did."
"What?"
"Being a man involved with business, everyone else does whatever they can to break you down. I was starting to get big and my competitors would do whatever it took to break me down. And they knew that if there was one way to break me, then it was through Aisha."
Khushi tilted her head, wanting to know more.
"I loved Aisha very much and I could never do that to her." He sighed. "Unfortunately, when someone told her that, she believed them... and never took my word when I tried to defend myself," he said, his voice cracking. "And then the next thing we knew... she committed sui-" but he couldn't finish the word, his throat choked up.
Khushi felt really bad as she watched the poor man cover his eyes with his hand, trying to hide his tears.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered.
Arhat wiped his tears away and held his left hand. "You know I still wear the same wedding ring I got when I married Aisha."
Khushi looked at his hand. "Really?'
Arhat nodded and took his wallet out. He took out a picture and handed it to Khushi. She looked at the somewhat-worn photo, showing Arhat and Aisha together. They were holding each other, their hands on each other's shoulder. Khushi looked at Arhat's hand and noticed that it was the same ring he was wearing now.
"You still wear it even though she's gone," Khushi asked, handing the photo back.
Arhat nodded. "I never took it off." He chuckled lightly. "I bet it's really white underneath the ring."
Khushi pursed her lips.
Arhat sighed. "I loved her very much," he said, looking at the ring. "I was miserable after she was gone. That's why I disappeared." He scoffed lightly. "Arnav takes it wrong and thinks that I left to be with the person I was "having an affair" with."
Khushi looked side to side.
"I don't blame him. He loved Aisha so much," he smiled. Leaning back, he sighed. "It was a long while later when I met Kaushali. She wasn't in a good condition to raise Kala, and I had been thinking of the children needing a mother figure, so we compromised and got married. Things worked out for her and Kala... as for Anjali and Arnav...."
Khushi looked down. Poor guy, she thought to herself.
"It's understandable," Khushi said, looking back up at him. "Having a maternal figure around is different than just having a paternal figure around."
Arhat just nodded.
"Um... I was wondering if you have any stuff of Arnav and Aisha together."
Arhat nodded. "Of course, follow me."
Khushi followed Arhat up to the second floor and entered a bedroom.
Arhat turned the light on. "This is Arnav's old room."
Khushi walked in and scanned the room. The room was the typical blue, containing a single size bed in the corner, a desk, a wardrobe, and a computer. It was obvious that this room belonged to teenager-Arnav.
"I'll leave you to it," Arhat smiled softly, and he left.
Khushi walked around the room and observed it. There was a cork board on the wall, filled with pictures of cars, guitars, models in bikinis, athletic figures, and some notes. One thing that caught her attention was a picture of young Arnav and his mother. Aisha was squeezing Arnav tightly in a hug, and Arnav was beaming brightly, his smile huge, going from end to end of his face. Khushi couldn't help but to smile as her heart fluttered. She couldn't stop herself from touching the picture.
If only he smiled like that all the time.
Walking around, she looked at the guitars that hung on the walls.
I didn't know he played.
Khushi headed to his closet and turned on the light. There were still some clothes hanging and Khushi couldn't help but to go through it. Teenage- Arnav's wardrobe was 200% different than present-Arnav's. One thing for sure, teenage-Arnav didn't do designer clothes. Except for one thing that had caught her eyes - an Armani biker jacket.Taking it off it's hanger, she took her cardigan off and slipped on the jacket. It was slightly big on her, but it wasn't so bad.
Khushi was about to walk away, when she noticed several boxes on the floor. She pulled them out and found a whole bunch of picture albums. Going through them, she saw many photos of Arnav when he was a little boy. Not only were there photo albums, but there were VHS videos. She looked through them and figured out that they were tapes of Arnav when he was young.
Seeing all the video tapes, Khushi wanted to watch them. She took all the boxes out, when she found a box covered with a blue blanket. Having a feeling, Khushi picked up the blanket and held it.
I don't know why, but this seems special. But even if it is, why is it here?
"That's his blanket."
Khushi whipped around and saw Anjali standing at the door. She came walking in, standing a few feet away from Khushi.
"My mother used to cover Chote up with that blanket. It became his favorite blanket," she smiled. "Even as he got older, he never got rid of it."
Khushi looked down at the blanker in her hands. Soft and touchy Arnav.
"For as far as my memory can serve me, I remember my mother loving Chote unconditionally."
Khushi scoffed lightly. "And he thinks Aisha didn't,"she said, shaking her head.
Anjali shut her eyes. "It hurts to know that he thinks that," she said, turning her head away.
Khushi nodded in agreement. Looking at the boxes around her, her mission to watch the videos grew even more. "Anjali, if you don't mind, can I take these to watch?"
Anjali nodded. "Sure. They sit around here getting dusty anyways. I come in here now and then to clean it up." She looked at Khushi. "I'll help you take them."
*~*
Getting back to the apartment, Khushi had the staff bring up the boxes, saving Anjali the trouble. Carrying the last box in, Khushi settled down in the media room, where all sorts of gadgets were contained. She took a tape and placed it into the VHS and rewound the tape to the beginning. Pressing play, she sat on the floor and watched.
Video after video played. They contained birthdays, parties, holidays, and so much more! One thing they all shared in common was the love that Aisha had for her son. It was crystal clear that Arnav was her life! It was also clear to Khushi that the love wasn't even near fake, as Arnav proclaimed.
A couple of hours passed, when Arnav came home. Walking right in, he headed into the living room. Etta came in and gave him a glass of water.
"Where's Khushi." Arnav asked.
"She's in the media room," Etta replied.
Arnav nodded and handed the glass back to Etta.
"Shall I start up dinner?"
Arnav nodded and Etta left to the kitchen. He took of his suit and loosened his tie, then headed to the media room. Opening the door, he found Khushi sitting on the floor, hugging her knees, remote in hand, staring at the projection screen. He looked at it and his eyes widened, seeing his 4th birthday playing. Arnav clenched his jaws, his anger growing by the second.
"Stop that video this instant," Arnav said through his teeth.
Khushi simply turned her head to face him. "No."
"Khushi stop playing it this instant!"
Khushi simply turned away and continued to watch the video. "What's it matter if I've already seen it once?"
Arnav bubbled. "Why did you get these videos in the first place?"
"To show you that she cares."
"What?"
Khushi placed the remote down beside her and got up and face him. "Arnav, it is crystal clear in these videos that Aisha loved you very much. Not only do the videos show it, but those pictures do as well," she said, gesturing to the boxes filled with the albums.
Arnav was fuming. He didn't care about what Khushi had to say. Ignoring everything she said, he went to the boxes filled with the VHS tapes, and threw them. Khushi's eyes widened as he threw the tapes and the photo albums. He grabbed the blanket and was about to ruin it, when he froze. At the sight of it, flashbacks played in his head.
He saw himself running around the house and Aisha was chasing him. He saw himself in his room, refusing to go to sleep, until his mother gave him his blanky. It had made him so happy, that he jumped up and gave her a tight hug.
Arnav snapped back to reality and just stared at the blanket.
"Please try to understand, Arnav," Khushi said softly. "Aisha did love you, she really did. You're just not understanding-"
"No," Arnav replied stubbornly. "No she didn't."
Now Khushi was angry. "For fuck's sake, she did love you," she yelled.
Arnav's eyes widened. He had never seen Khushi this angry before.
"She didn't leave you and she committed suicide because she thought her husband was cheating on her! She was emotional! She was upset! She didn't die hating you! She loved you!!"
But Arnav wasn't any less angry. "Just shut up Khushi! Just shut up! You don't know anything and you don't know me!"
"I do fucking know you! You're a guy that does crazy fuckery! You use sex as a stress relief! You used to hire girls for sex! You're private and you hate your Steps! You used to do pot, you love Anjali, and you think that you're mother faked her love when she didn't! What other fucking shit is left to know!!!"
Khushi exhaled deeply and looked down. Arnav was about to say something, but Khushi cut him off.
"I'm done."
Arnav scrunched his eyebrows. "What do you mean?"
Khushi looked up at him. "I can't take it anymore. I'm leaving you."
Arnav's eyes widened as he felt his world crashing down.
