Chapter Seventy One

Life. That was what Arnav was to her. Khushi understood this perfectly clear when he held her protectively in his arms that night. However, Khushi couldn't sleep. She couldn't believe that after everything she told him, after telling him her grave secret, Arnav was still here, sleeping beside her.

Even after knowing that I'm a murderer, he's still here.....

Arnav stirred and sighed, his hold loosening for a moment before tightening again.

"You didn't kill her Khushi."

Arnav words echoed in her mind. It was true, for a time she thought the same. But because of Akash....

Memories of them flashed in her mind and she cringed with disgust. She tried her best to empty her mind and fall asleep,  but she could only think of memories past. She thought of the old days in high school, Akash in his blue varsity jacket with the rest of the team and her sister under his arm. She would watch from a distance, seeing the two kiss right before her eyes.

Khushi turned, hoping that the sight of Arnav would calm her. So she turned in his hold and found eyes looking at her. Only it wasn't Arnav looking at her - it was Akash.

"Did you miss me?"

Khushi shot up straight, breathing heavily. She ran her hand through her hair, trying to process what had just happens. She never realized when she had fallen asleep and that nightmare....

Arnav stirred and woke up. He saw the condition Khushi was in and sat up. "Angel, what's wrong?"

Khushi shook her head. "Nothing-"

"Angel," he warned.

Khushi sighed and looked down at her hands in her lap. "I had a nightmare that Akash was sleeping beside me instead of you," she whispered.

Arnav nodded in acknowledgement and held her to him. "He's not here Khushi. I understand that telling me this has opened old, unhealed wounds so it's likely for you to have a nightmare like that."

Khushi shook her head, running her hand through her hair. "Why did I have to be so damaged," she muttered.

Arnav took her hand in his. "I guess that's what makes us perfect for each other."

Khushi looked up at him.

"We're both damaged goods."

Khushi smiled sadly, squeezing his hand lightly.

"But that's what makes us perfect. Because we'll fix each other up along the way."

He placed a kiss on her forehead and got up. Khushi watched him for a moment and when he got to the door, she spoke.

"I love you, jaan."

Arnav paused at the door and looked back at her. "I love you too angel," he smiled softly.

Khushi smiled softly with a blush, as if she were a newly wedded bride.

Newly wedded bride?!

Khushi got out of bed and looked at the calendar. They were already more than halfway through summer. The best time for a summer wedding was over. She could do a fall wedding, but weather was unpredictable and it might end up being chilly. And a winter wedding? Snowfall is pretty but the cold? Forget it!

What do I do?

Arnav came back into the room and found Khushi in front of the calendar, looking worried. "Is everything okay angel?"

"No!" Khushi nibbled on her finger nails.

Arnav went over to her and looked at the calendar. It seemed absolutely fine, there was nothing on it-

Oh shit!

Every month, the calendar would always get a big red circle on just one date, and one date only.

This month didn't have that.

"Khushi-"

"Don't you Khushi me!"

"Okay, angel-"

"Don't you angel me!!"

Khushi continued to nibble on her nail and Arnav tried to reach out to her, but she swatted his hand away.

"Angel-"

"Hush Arnav, I need to think."

"Okay, just don't panic-"

"Panic?! Why would I panic? There's no need to panic, I'm not panicking!"

No she wasn't, and that's because she was being hysterical instead.

"Angel-!"

"This is serious Arnav! I mean I can't have my wedding in the cold!"

Arnav's eyebrows shot up.

"Can you imagine that? The breeze will make the flames go out and we won't be wedded! That's awful!"

Arnav blinked a few times. "What the-?"

"Oh don't you start with the what the crap now Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada! If we're going to get married, it's gonna have to be next summer and I can't wait that long!"

Khushi turned to him and gripped his arms.

"Can we elope?"

Now Arnav looked at her with shock. "What?"

"I don't want to hold the wedding off anymore. To be honest Arnav, I haven't thought about marriage and my wedding in years, at least, not in detail. When I was younger I would always dream about it, but for years I didn't have the time to really think specifics. Don't get me wrong, I do want a grand wedding, but I just don't want to wait anymore," she said softly.

Arnav blinked and then brought her into his arms. Khushi hugged him back then rested her chin on his chest with a pout.

"Pweez," she asked sweetly.

Arnav chuckled and kissed her pouting lips. "To tell you the truth, I would love to elope with you."

Khushi's eyes widened with joy and she hugged him again, then kissed him. "Thank you, thank you!"

Arnav smiled softly. "Anything for you angel. Though I have to admit, you had me worried for a moment."

"What do you mean," she asked, scrunching her eyebrows.

"The way you were looking at the calendar and with the absence of the red circle..."

Khushi's eyes widened.

"...it kind of had me thinking something else."

She looked at the calendar and then at him, then mentally calculated. "I've got time."

Arnav nodded.

Khushi thought about it for a moment. "You thought... you thought I was pregnant?"

Arnav nodded. "Or at least thought you did."

Khushi looked down. "That's...."

It hadn't been long that Khushi had gone on the pill. It was some time after they had returned from Dubai that Khushi had decided to go on them. In fact, she had thought of doing it before, but always forgot to. Arnav had agreed with her on it, though he would use a condom now and then to be extra safe and simply out of habit.

"If I were to get pregnant...." Khushi looked up at him.

Arnav caressed her cheek. "I wouldn't love you any less."

Khushi simply looked at him.

"To be honest Khushi, I've never thought of having a family. Ever. Because I thought I was incapable of love."

Khushi looked down, taking his left hand in her right.

"And now here I am, engaged to the most beautiful girl in world."

Khushi blushed, toying with his ring.

"Because I know now that I am capable of love and am getting married to my angel, only now does having a family come to my mind."

He cupped her face and tilted it up.

"And having a little baby girl like you..."

Khushi blushed harder.

"Would be perfect," he smiled.

Khushi looked down and toyed with his t-shirt. "And if I want a baby boy like you," she nearly whispered.

"Then we'll have you on your toes."

Khushi frowned but her smile could not be helped. She buried her face in his chest and hugged him, Arnav hugging her back.

"One day."

"One day," Arnav confirmed. "Now come on, time to get you ready."

"Wah," Khushi pouted.

But Arnav would have none of it, and took her to the bathroom to get her ready for the day.

*~*

After the emotional evening and bumpy morning they had, Arnav had decided that he would take his angel out and lift her mood. Both had gotten ready and while Khushi whined, wanting to know where they were going, Arnav kept giving her the eye, refusing to answer her.

"Keep whining angel, and I'll have to take you over my knee," Arnav warned.

"What's so wrong in telling me," Khushi pouted.

"It won't be a surprise, that's what."

"Wah!"

Arnav tried to frown, but couldn't stop the curving of his lips. "Angel," he tried to warn.

"You're humored, don't deny it," Khushi teased.

She strutted to the door, purposely swaying her hips, and Arnav charged at her, taking her over his shoulder.

Khushi gasped, gripping onto Arnav's waist. "Arnav!"

Instead of responding, he playfully smacked her butt.

"Hey!"

Arnav only chuckled and locked the door. "Behave."

Khushi frowned and wiggled in his hold, hoping that he'd release her. Instead, he smacked her ass again.

"What the-!"

"Oh don't you what the me, angel." He brought her forward, putting her on her feet. "That's my line," he smirked.

Khushi tried to frown at him, but she couldn't help her smile. So she stuck her tongue out at him and when he frowned back, Khushi dashed, Arnav running after her. They both got outside and immediately Khushi halted, Arnav stopping behind her when they saw Shyam.

"Khushi, where have you been," Shyam asked as he went over to her.

He tried to pull his sister into a hug, but Arnav wrapped his arm around Khushi's waist. Shyam's eyes darted to his hold then back at his sister. "Khushi, where did you disappear off to? You just left without a word and wouldn't pick up the phone!"

"As you can see, I'm fine," Khushi said, not looking at him.

"But-"

"Let's go angel," Arnav said softly, and tried to guide her away, when Shyam blocked him.

"My sister and I are having a conversation."

Arnav scoffed lightly. "The way I see it, there wasn't one to begin with." He looked at Khushi. "Let's go."

Arnav tried to go around Shyam again, but again Shyam blocked him.

"My sister and I need to talk, so let her go."

"I don't think she wants to."

"That's for her to decide."

"Well he's right," Khushi said. "I don't want to talk to you."

"What? But Khushi-"

"You've done enough Bhai, seriously, enough. I don't want to talk to you... nor look at you."

Shyam's eyes widened a Khushi tried to go around him, taking Arnav with her.

"He's taking complete control of you Khushi," Shyam called out. "Are you really going to let him-?"

Khushi whipped around and went up to her brother's face. "I am my own person, and I decide for myself. I don't want to talk you, nor look at you!"

"Khushi-"

"You gave Akash my number! How could you?"

Both Shyam's and Arnav's eyes widened.

He did what, Arnav thought as his fists clenched.

"But then again you don't know everything, now then do you? Regardless, you shouldn't have done that, not at all! Just go back to being a pathetic druggie!"

Khushi joined Arnav and grabbed his hand, pulling him away. She didn't want to see her brother, she didn't want to be anywhere near her brother. She just wanted to get away.

*~*

It wasn't the reaction Arnav had wanted and expected, but going into Buffalo Wild Wings lifted Khushi's mood. He had wanted her to jump with joy, knowing how much she loved this place, let alone chicken wings. He didn't understand it, but he chose not to question it - if it brought her joy, then it brought him joy.

Having been together for so long and being engaged, Khushi didn't care if she made a mess of herself in front Arnav. So when their food arrived, she dug right in and she knew Arnav had hard her moan.

"Don't judge me," she said immediately.

Arnav chuckled and reached out to wipe away the sauce that had smeared on her face. "I won't."

Khushi frowned. "You are."

"I am not."

"Then eat."

"Okay," he chuckled.

Khushi eyed him, watching him get his hands dirty, smeared in barbecue sauce. "The great Arnav Singh Raizada is eating with his hands - I never thought I'd live to see this day."

Arnav frowned at her. "This is not the first time I'm eating with my hands."

"True... eh, it's still a big deal, Mr. Fancy Pants."

Arnav rolled his eyes and Khushi chuckled, taking a sip of her drink.

For a moment, neither said a word, though Arnav was watching her as she devoured her food.

"I'm changing your number."

Khushi nearly coughed out her drink. "Whoa, what?"

"He won't even get a chance to talk to you."

Khushi gulped. Oh boy.

"Knowing you, you pick up almost any call you get, and I won't take that chance."

Khushi looked down. Suddenly, the wings didn't seem so appetizing.

Arnav looked at her carefully. "Unless...."

Khushi refused to look at him.

"He already did."

Her pursed lips told him exactly want he needed to know. Khushi knew he was angry and opened her mouth to speak, when their waitress arrived. Only now did she notice the way she was ogling Arnav, and she wanted to punch her as bad as the thought was. But Arnav pain her no attention, looking steely at Khushi as he commanded her for the bill. Khushi heard the waitress speak flirtatiously and her blood boiled, not just to her tone, but the way Arnav's voice was demanding.

"You are not allowed to take to anyone with that tone," Khushi gritted.

Arnav said nothing and the waitress came right back. Immediately, he popped out his black AMEX and the waitress was momentarily stunned before going away to charge the card.

"We're leaving," he said cooly.

Khushi scoffed. "Gee, you sure you wanna use that tone with me, I thought you'd rather use it with her!"

Arnav stared her down and Khushi refused to break. It didn't take long for the waitress to return. As she spoke and thanked them for coming, Arnav took his card, glanced at the receipt for the tip, and pulled out his wallet. Placing more than asked for, he got up from his seat. Khushi twitched her lips and walked away, Arnav following not to far behind.

Times Square was bustling as always, or as Khushi would say, insane! She wanted to stomp down the street, but that was impossible with the number of tourists stopping in front of you every five seconds, and the swarm of people only creating little walk space. So she huffed as she walked, feeling Arnav right behind her. He eventually caught up to her and wrapped his arm around her waist. Khushi wanted to push him away, but there was no way that she could, no without losing her step and being stomped over, so she had to let him do it.

When they finally got away from the swarm, she released herself and stomped to the parking lot, not stopping until she had gotten to the car. She waited for Arnav to unlock the doors and when he did, she got into the driver's seat. Khushi was somewhat surprised when Arnav didn't say anything, but forced herself to cover it.

Arnav shut the door to the passenger seat. "You know you're failing miserably at hiding your shock, right?"

Khushi growled, staring him down - not that it had any affect on him.

"You're an angel sweetheart, not a little monster."

Khushi growled again. "Don't talk to me like that, I'm not a little girl!"

"You sure about that? If you want, you could be, and I'll be your daddy," he said softly, taking hold of her hand.

But Khushi freed her hand with another growl. "Oh don't try to pacify me with your kinky sex talk!"

For a minute, Arnav was stunned, until he broke out with laughter. It left Khushi stunned, though her heart melted at the sight of him.

"Now how can I be mad at that," Khushi sighed.

Arnav calmed down, a smile on his face.

"I'm sorry," Khushi said softly, hugging herself. "I don't know what came over me."

"Jealousy?"

"Hormones," she said casually.

Arnav grinned and Khushi finally broke out into a smile.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, jealousy."

"That's very cute of you angel."

"Hey," she reached out and fisted his shirt in her hand, pulling him to her. "You're mine."

"Possessive," Arnav said with appreciation, a smirk making its mark on his  face.

"Very. You're mine and I'm yours, and you can only use that tone with me, no one else."

"You sure you went me to tell you what to do?"

Khushi remembered her brothers words, and knew that Arnav was thinking the same. "Arnav, don't."

"He has a point."

"He does't know anything!"

"And if he finds out?"

"He won't."

"Khushi-"

"Arnav, don't. He won't find out, and besides he has no say in my sexual life whatsoever, that is so disgusting and I can't believe that sentence came out of my mouth."

Arnav chuckled lightly. "That's what any normal brother-sister relationship should be like."

Khushi's mind instantly thought of Kalvati as much as she didn't want to. "Forget Kala."

"I know," and he took he hand, placing a kiss on the palm of it.

"I wish Bhai hadn't come like that - he ruined the wings," she pouted.

"True... but I think the thought of Akash really ruined it."

Instantly at the sound of his name, a tremble shuck through her body, and Arnav had noticed it. He held her hand in his with a firm grip. "When did he call you."

As he had expected, Khushi tried to free herself, but he wouldn't let  her. This was one thing he wouldn't let go.

"When did he call you."

Again, it wasn't a question, and Khushi knew better. "Before we left to Dubai," she nearly whispered.

Arnav's eyes widened with shock. "Before we-"

It all made sense now. Arnav now understood why Khushi had quickly changed her mind about going away with him. "Tell me."

Khushi looked down and with a sigh, she spoke. "I already have his number saved on my phone."

She felt his shock before she saw it, but he didn't speak.

"After what I had been through, I just wanted to be cautious. An old friend from high school had given me his number when I asked her for it - she knew everyone in town pretty well, so getting the number wasn't hard. I think she's one of the only people who was on my side in all of it.

"Once she got me the number, I held onto it. I made sure to save it on my landline so that I knew it was him in case he ever got my number, however it was possible. Then you gave me a phone as a present, which still to this day makes me feel myeh cause that's too expensive, and I saved it on there, paranoid he'd get my number somehow. Each phone you gave me, regardless or not I wanted it, I saved it as a warning. I knew it was crazy of me to do, but I needed to do it... and then it finally happened.

"It was right after classes ended, and the day was perfect. But then he called and it all went to shit! My body... it was as if all of the alarms went off and I was stunned, curling into a ball. Etta heard me screaming and came running. Bhai came and I forced the two not to say anything to you. ...I was afraid you'd leave me," she whispered.

Arnav squeezed her hand and she looked at him. It still didn't make sense to her that he was still here, that he still wanted her with all of his heart.

"Bhai kept asking what had happened, and I acted like a maniac, saying that you were going to leave me."

"So... he doesn't know?"

"About what Akash did to me? No, he was always stoned out of his mind."

Arnav scoffed. "Why am I not surprised he was a druggie."

"What is it with all these men in my life who love smoking pot," Khushi said sarcastically, and Arnav frowned, though Khushi could tell he was struggling with his smile trying to come though.

"No, Bhai didn't know," Khushi sighed. "I couldn't tell anyone, not with the way he as torturing me."

Arnav was quiet for a moment, toying with her ring. "What did he do?"

Memories of the past came crashing in her head and she had to grip onto the steering wheel to get her grasp back on reality.

Arnav understood that this was difficult for her. "Khushi-"

"No. I always wanted to tell someone of my problems. I need to get it off my chest."

Arnav squeezed her hand lightly and Khushi took a deep beath.

"It was like he stalked me. Where I was, what I was doing, he knew. Even in my own house I wasn't safe. Bhai and him are friends, so he was constantly over, and I was helpless. He would pop out of nowhere and constantly taunted me of Payal's death. My parents were barely home, working, and with Bhai being constantly stoned, I was basically alone.

"He constantly cornered me... touched me..."

Arnav's grip on her tightened and she squeezed his hand as well.

"He never got a chance to go too far but... he once got close."

"What happened?"

"I had gotten home after going over to Sheetal's - the friend I mentioned earlier. We had just had a study date, so to say. I was in the bathroom washing up, when he came walking right in...I was bent over the sink to wash my face...."

Arnav's grip tightened once more and so did Khushi's at the disgusting memory.

"He... he pressed himself against me and..."

His grip tightened even more and so did Khushi's.

"He gripped my hair and my waist-"

Tears came streaming down Khushi's cheeks. Her mind played the memory before her eyes, remembering how he had grinded against her and how she had felt him. She felt disgusted and wanted the memory out of her mind immediately, so she moved over and straddled Arnav, jamming her lips onto his.

"Make me forget it, get the memory out of mind, I don't want to think about it, I don't, I don't, I don't," she cried.

Arnav didn't respond and simply kissed her, caressing her face. Khushi reached in between them and undid Arnav's jeans, undoing the button and tugging down the zipper. She felt him and ran her hand over his length, making him hard, and released his length. Arnav reached below her dress to the waistband of her panties and pulled them apart, the simple piece of lace disintegrating in his hands. Not wasting a second, Khushi buried him inside of her and groaned, gripping onto Arnav's hair.

"Slowly baby," Arnav whispered.

Khushi did as he said, moving slowly along his length. The bad memories began to fade away with each thrust, removing fear from her mind as bliss took it's place.

"Don't ever let me go jaan," Khushi said softly, through her tears.

"Never, angel, never."

Khushi pulled him closer to her, resting her cheek on top of his head. "Arnav I can't, I need this faster."

Without waiting for his response, she began to ride him faster, her grip tightening on his hair. Arnav gripped onto her waist as she rode him harder and faster, burying his face against her chest.

Khushi kissed the top of his head. "Fuck Arnav, I'm going to cum," she cried with a whisper, afraid someone might her her.

After all, they were still in the lot.

"Cum for me angel."

Arnav maneuvered her along his length, meeting thrust for thrust as he kissed and sucked along her neck. In an instant, they came crashing down from their high, Khushi quickly bringing her hand to her mouth to bite back her scream, while her other hand gripped tightly onto  Arnav's hair. Arnav tightly gripped onto Khushi's waist as he released his load into her, forcing back his groan.

Khushi came down from her high and tilted Arnav's chin up to her so that he looked at her. "Marry me."

Arnav smiled softly. "I believe I was the one to ask that first."

"Marry me. Right now."